Beer Club Apparel by Kate: eyes down here, fellas!
Ingredients: Ladies (three or more), Beer, Snacks
Step 1) Get a beer. Get it in a good beer bar. And preferably one where they know you by name. The bar my friend Kate and I go to is one door down from my bookstore. This makes it both very convenient and very dangerous. They usually have a good selection of bottled craft beers as well as some exotic cocktails including the Gin Basil (which is also very dangerous). After my first beer, the delightful Baba from Uinta, I begin to feel a certain largesse and order this beautiful, basil-flecked martini, shaken exactly 100 times before strained into my glass. “Llalan, can I get you another Gin Basil?”
Step 2) Stick with ordering beer and discuss the purpose of your beer club. We start a list. We’re good at lists.
- Drink good beer
- Try new beer
- Discuss said beer
- Do all of the above in the company of good women
- Tighten our relationships with said good women
Every club worth its weight in Gin Basils has a mission statement that makes it sound important, so here we go: We strive to explore the world of beer and spread the culture of beer within the context of an open and friendly environment of women only, to preserve the historical context of the beverage and minimize the incidents of mansplaining.
3) Make another list! (Ask for more cocktail napkins, if necessary.) Who do you want to invite to your group? Preferable member characteristics include but aren’t limited to:
- Adventuresome
- Curious
- Friendly
- Has Vagina
That’s about it. Kate and I end up with a fairly long list of lovely ladies. It’s best if their names make you smile when you say them. At this point we’re grinning like idiots.
4) By now it has to be time for a snack. Order a bowl of warm artisan olives and the cheese board and outline group meeting parameters. Monthly? Bi-weekly? (They call daily enabling.) Some other issues to consider:
- Where you will meet. Different bars each time or one particularly good beer bar? Each other’s homes? Your friendly local bookstore?
- How to format your meetings. Beer tastings by style or brewer? Travel to breweries together?
- Who’s paying.
5) Once all the above steps are completed, you may move on to the last and most important step: naming your group! Acronyms are encouraged, especially of the euphemistic variety. Par example:
- BRA (Babes Revel in Ale)
- BABES (Bitches And Beer Equals Sweet!)
- LAGER (Ladies Appreciating Great Equality and beeR)
- LABIA (Ladies And Beer Inspire Awesomeness)
These get better the more beer you have, probably needless to say. If you have any further questions before you begin your own Ladies Beer Club, you’ll find me and mine two doors down.